Guest Review: ZOMBIE FLESH EATERS at The Robot's Pajamas

Since 2014, The Robot's Pajamas has been running Horror Month during October -- the basic theme being that in the lead-up to Halloween, they publish a review of a horror film each day of the month.

Now regular readers might...just might...have noticed that I'm quite fond of horror. So when they put out the call back in 2014, I decided to volunteer my services, and contributed a review of Creature From the Black Lagoon, which you can read here. I missed 2015, but I returned for 2016 with a review of  weird Italian classic The Beyond.

This year I've contributed a review of Zombie Flesh Eaters, which you can read here. Hope you enjoy it -- and have a look around The Robot's Pajamas as well. If you like my site, you'll love theirs!

POP! Disney – Halloween Donald (2017 Fall Convention Exclusive)

Kingdom Hearts. It has a truly dedicated fanbase, but I’m not one of them. I played a few hours of the first game on PS2. It was fun, but I wasn’t (and am not) enough of a Disney or Square Enix fan to make my way through the entire thing.

So as with the Sleestak – if I don’t care about the property, why the hell did I fork out for this?

Basically, it’s because I’m a sucker for mummies. I’ve been obsessed with Ancient Egypt since I was a little kid. In the last few years alone, I’ve bought all manner of silly mummy-related merchandise since, including a Ninja Turtles pin, both POPs from the decidedly mediocre 2017 The Mummy, a POP and Mystery Mini from the excellent Boris Karloff movie, plenty of Lego, two Madballs, and a bunch of other Egyptian stuff that hasn’t made the site. So Halloween Donald here is hardly a stretch at this point.

Having now purchased him, I’m happier with him than I expected to be. The paint is better than average for a Funko POP, and the bandages have an appropriately brown look – it’s a step up on most pop culture mummies, who tend to just throw some clean white bandages at an existing character and hope for the best. In a world where people collect any old crap that Disney and Square Enix care to pump out, Funko must be commended for going the extra mile.  

My only real issue is that he’s cast in transparent plastic, to emulate his semi-ghostly look from the game. It may be “accurate” but it doesn’t end up looking terribly convincing; it probably could be executed via more sophisticated moulding techniques, but I doubt it would be cost-effective.  

This is a fun extra for Kingdom Hearts fans or general Disney obsessives, and pretty non-essential for everyone else. But as an avowed fan of Ancient Egypt, it was a must-have for me.   

POP! Television: Stranger Things – Mr Clarke (2017 Summer Convention Exclusive)

Though we don’t see a ton of him in Season 1, Mr Clarke was a great character, and quite integral to the plot of Stranger Things. I suspect that if the show had been set in more contemporary times, the role would have been played in a slightly more…creepy…fashion, but fortunately that particular trope was avoided on this occasion. Mr Clarke is just a genuinely nice guy who wants to encourage the kids’ knowledge.

This POP showcases Mr Clarke about halfway through the series, when he demonstrates how a door between the “real” world and the (theoretical to Mr Clarke) Upside Down. The sculpt isn’t that exciting; Mr Clarke is just a dorky guy in a suit after all. But the paint is really cool, specially the tampo of Mr Clarke’s diagram on the paper plate itself! For this element alone, the figure is worth picking up – with the caveat that you should only pay retail for him.

Even a couple of years ago, Funko’s SDCC exclusives were pretty much repaints of existing sculpts. They offered something unusual, but not totally essential to consider your collection complete. But things have changed since those days; now we see unique sculpts, and characters that don’t come out anywhere else.

Plenty of people are happy about this, but personally I think it’s a bit of a mixed bag. Mr Clarke isn’t necessarily a key character in Stranger Things, he is a bit of a fan favourite, and I’m not sure that releasing him as an exclusive was the best idea. Importantly, it sets a bad precedent for the way we may see other fan-favourite characters released. Convention exclusives are fairly easy to come by in Australia, but it’s not the same way in the US in particular. 

As it stands, Mr Clarke is a cool POP – but not cool enough to pay crazy aftermarket prices. Here’s to seeing more of Mr Clarke in Season 2, and hopefully that this POP – or another version of him – gets a more general release in the future. 

Pint Size Heroes (Horror) – Pinhead

While many of us own scores (if not hundreds) of DVDs and Blu-rays these days, younger readers may be surprised to learn this was highly unusual back in the 80s and 90s. VHS tapes were expensive, not to mention incredibly space-consuming. Renting and home recording were the order of the day.  

But if you did grow up around the same time as I did, you probably remember the golden age of video stores. VHS was a far inferior format to DVD and Blu-ray, but I do have very fond memories of browsing through the aisles of the local store, trying to decide which video I’d rent that week – opt for something I knew I enjoyed, or take a risk on something I’d never seen before? A virtually immaterial question in these days of cheap DVDs and online streaming, but of crucial importance to a 9 or 10-year-old in the mid-90s.

For me, the horror section was particularly intriguing. This was in no small part because it was almost totally forbidden as a child. My parents were never been outrageously strict, but they were products of 1980s church culture. Horror films were just one of many things to be treated with suspicion, potentially touched by the taint of The Occult. But that aside, there was a healthy dose of pragmatism and good parenting in play here too – horror films really aren’t for meant for little kids, after all!

Even without the forbidden aspect, the horror section was fascinating at a visual level. Weird creatures, odd graphic design choices, horrifying illustrations…they worked hard to get you to pick up the case and rent them. Graveyard Shift was one that always jumped out at me. It’s not much to look at now, but I was terrified of skulls as a kid, and the image has stuck with me to this day.  Of course, having subsequently seen plenty of these films as a teen or adult, I can attest that most of the cases were far more garish and upsetting than anything that happens in the actual films themselves.  

But what does all of this have to do with today’s review, you ask?

Well, the garish cover rule doesn’t apply to Hellraiser. Pinhead was terrifying on the VHS case, but the film itself is far more disturbing. In the last 12 months I’ve been fortunate enough to watch it with two separate groups of people who’d never seen it before, and each time I found myself a little horrified on their behalf at various points during the movie. It’s not a film for the squeamish viewer, with its mix of violence, skinned people, BDSM imagery. 

As such, the amount of cutesy merchandise that has been released in the last few years seems pretty incongruous with the license itself. Multiple Funko POPs, a Dorbz figure, Living Dead Dolls, fluffy dice…and now, the subject of today’s review, a Pint Size Heroes figure.

When I first ran across Pint Size Heroes, Pinhead was one of my only must-have figures. I’m a huge fan of the first Hellraiser movie, but my enjoyment of Clive Barker’s work in general has really expanded this year. While I was in the UK a couple of months ago, I read his debut novel The Damnation Game and am now working my way through the Books of Blood. A couple of other bits and pieces of his are also sitting on the “to-read” shelf at the moment too. So an additional Pinhead seemed to be the logical fit; not to mention that his design has translated quite well to the format.  

In stark contrast to his actual demeanour, Pinhead has never looked so cute. Unlike Jason, the tampographs are pretty excellent, and impressively detailed. Pinhead’s flayed chest, gruesome tools of the trade, and even his bellybutton piercing have made the transition. No Lament Configuration, but it would have been tricky to make work in the format. Though only the upper point of each of his pins is painted, it still creates a convincing illusion at a distance, and holds up when enough when viewed more closely.       

I’ve previously expressed hope that Funko makes more of the Cenobites – and though this wouldn’t be my preferred format, Pint Size Heroes probably aren’t a bad way to test the waters for their sales potential, which could lead to future POPs or Mystery Minis. Whether or not that happens remains to be seen, of course.

Ultimately, Pinhead is a fun little figure. As I stated in my review of Jason, I have no interest in collecting the complete line, but I’m glad to have him up on the shelf. 

Pint Size Heroes (Horror) – Jason Voorhees

Well, we’re now well into October – just two weeks from Halloween, in fact. Now Halloween didn’t mean a lot to me as a kid; during my childhood it was treated as either with suspicion as a sign of America’s cultural imperialism, or with outright hostility as a sign of the devil’s work. I still see plenty of people doing both those things now – but for the most part I’ve really enjoyed seeing the holiday more widely adopted in Australia during my lifetime.

And for Halloween aficionados, this October was more special than most, as it was also host to a Friday the 13th. Now while I think that the superstitions surrounding the date of Friday the 13th are complete bullshit, I am a fan of the Friday the 13^th films. Which is how we tenuously lead into the subject of today’s review – the Pint Size Hero version of Jason Voorhees, from Funko. 

Pint Size Heroes are one of Funko’s latest additions to their ever-expanding line of cutesy, stylised collector’s toys. They’re tiny standing only around 1.5” high, and given some rough sense of height and proportion to differentiate themselves from one another via their differing head sizes. The most obvious point of comparison is their Dorbz range, but obviously smaller.

When Funko announced a horror range, it was a total non-surprise that Jason Voorhees was included. He was the very first POP! Movies character released, and a very safe bet in terms of driving sales. Being a Jason fan I’m naturally pleased about this, but I do hope they dig a little deeper in future lines and get some characters that we haven’t already had in POP form. 

This particular figure is based on Jason’s appearance in Friday the 13th: Part III, so he’s kind of plain. Hockey mask, work shirt and pants, with none of the various stages of undeath that would could later down the track. Given that Freddy’s also included in this series, I was surprised that they didn’t go for the Freddy vs Jason look, but perhaps there’s some kind of licensing issue.

Paint is not great. I picked up two other characters at the same time, and Jason is easily the worst of the three. The tampographs making up his pants and shirt are kind of misaligned, while the mask and strapping is a bit sloppy. I suspect that the mask is likely to be an across-the-board issue, but I imagine the issue with the tampographing is more of a one-off.

While ultimately not as cool as Mystery Minis or POPs, Pint Size Heroes are still far better than Dorbz. I have no interest in completing the collection for this line, but there are a few key characters that I was happy to add to the collection – you should see my take on them on here in the next few days.  

POP! Televison – Sleestak (2017 Fall Convention Exclusive)

My exposure to the various TV series created by Sid & Marty Krofft has been pretty minimal. I don’t recall any of their series being on TV at an age where I would have noticed. H.R. Pufnstuf is probably the most famous in Australia, and had some kind of VHS re-release around the time I hit high school, but I’d aged out of the target audience by then.

I’m sure the shows were quite charming in their day, and I can appreciate why some of my older friends have fond nostalgic memories of them. But it all kind of falls a bit flat with me. So with that out the way, you’re no doubt wondering why the hell I bought a Sleestak at inflated convention exclusive prices? 

A complex question which has a simple answer – Reptilians. I’ve spoken on here numerous times about my enjoyment of UFO literature, and this Sleestak is likely the closest thing Funko will ever release to a Reptilian.

These alleged creatures have probably most heavily popularised by David Icke, former professional soccer player and noted conspiracy theorist. By his definition, reptilians are an offshoot of ancient astronaut ideas; sinister shapeshifting creatures who make up most of the globe’s elite (e.g. Presidents, Prime Ministers, pop culture figures), exploiting the common folk for their own benefit. This alleged control has been going on more or less since the dawn of civilisation. In the years since he first introduced the idea in his writings, it’s infiltrated mainstream and fringe pop culture alike; it’s a joke to many, but taken seriously by a dedicated few*.  

Of course, Icke’s ideas weren’t without precedent. The most obvious inspiration is the TV miniseries V, which featured reptilians disguised as humans. But things extend back further; Theosophical beliefs, Robert E. Howard’s fantasy stories, and reports of alien abduction have all played their part in developing this cultural myth. 

The Sleestak are really just another piece in this puzzle. Originally appearing as semi-villainous creatures on Sid and Marty Krofft’s The Land of the Lost, it’s not hard to see how closely they resemble the reptilians of conspiracy theory. One must also ask if Dale A. Russell had been drawing from their design when he hypothesised the “Dinosauroid” back in the early 80s, too.  It’s a cool design which, while dated, is still kind of unnerving thanks to those horrifying blank eyes.

The sculpt and paint are solid, making this a great piece for fans of Land of the Lost and the Kroffts in general. I’m not a fan of the show, and bought it for much more niche reasons but I’m still very happy with it**. I know I say this a lot -- but this really is one piece where your mileage really will vary according to personal taste.

  

*I feel it would be helpful to note here that I in no way believe or endorse Icke’s ideas. Reptilians make for entertaining science fiction tropes, but the man himself has some dubious associations.

**Hopefully we get a glow version in the future too!